thewordsofclayton:

sirtarantino:

a guy walked into the board room and said

"hi sweetheart if you could fix me up a coffee real quick im meeting with the regional reports manager in like five minutes, thanks darling"

and i just stared at him and coldly said

"i am the regional reports manager"

we are now twenty minutes into this board meeting and i dont think i’ve ever seen a man look so embarrassed and afraid in my whole life

Good

(Source: sofiajonze, via reparteeist)

obstinate-nocturna:

cyphercat:

scareina:

Everyone, you realize what this means, right?

Caliborn, as Lord English, is just cosplaying his OC.

The OC that he stole, from fanart someone drew.

Fanart that is wearing that coat, because it was seen in the Felt Intermission.

Let that sink in for a moment. Homestuck has actually established a closed paradox loop OUTSIDE OF THE COMIC PROPER.

At this point the fourth wall is just over in the corner crying.

#you kidding the fourth wall is an actual manifested physical item in the comic#that’s how goddamn meta we are

(via avidauthor)

pensacosi:

How to make comics

My first vine

(Source: vine.co, via carcinocarnivals)

iguanamouth:

the fourth set of commissioned unusual dragon hoards ! looks like the breakfast and comic book hoarders might be cousins huh ? ? 

(part 1) (part 2) (part 3)

(via reparteeist)

Fanon Damara: ME SO HORNY!!!!!
Canon Damara: YOU MAD BRO?
Fanon Rufioh: Haha....yeah doll.....1 w1sh 1 was normal sometimes.....
Canon Rufioh: Haha....yeah doll....1 w1sh 1 had more self confidence.....1'm not nearly as amaz1ng as everyone th1nks.... what do you mean "What do you mean everyone?"?
Fanon Mituna: TUL4 TUL4 TUL444 1M FELL DOWN!!!??!!111 K155 MY BOOBOO
Canon Mituna: 7 VAGANIA5. M4BY3 MOR3. IMANGINE... OW FUCK 1 5WE4R TO G0GDGDGD FL00R 1F YOU DON'T C3LM ETH FUCK DOWN 1 W1LL 2I48YT8QM4830JQF NVQHIOQJFQ22408 .... H3Y L4TUL4 1 G0T 4 800800 0N MY 8ULG3 3H3H3H3H3H3H3
Fanon Kankri: 6lah 6lah 6lah 6lah 6lah TW TW TW (# OH GOD I JUST WANT SOMEONE TO LOVE ME.)
Canon Kankri: Furtherm9re, I think I speak f9r all 9f us *right s9rt* 9f pe9ple that acting in such a pr96lematic manner (# not to mention disagreeing with because WTF that practically means y9u disagree with s9cial pr9gress as a c9ncept) means y9u have internalized a6liesm, casteism, speciesism, and yes, even the very min9r prejudice of sexism, meaning even th9ugh you are (allegedly) warm6looded, disa6led, m*tant, and female, y9u are, perhaps, w9rse than regular privileged individuals, which I must say is n9t a very flattering way of 6eing. It w9uld 6e m9re c9nducive t9 a safe space if you were t9, y9u kn9w, st9p existing, 6ut such is the way 9f the w9rld, isn't it? (#H9nestly we pretty much want y9u t9 kill y9urself #6ut I can't say THAT al9ud, can I?)
Fanon Meulin: SQUEEEEEEEE!!! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!!
Canon Meulin: ....SQUEEEEEEE!!! YOU DON'T UNDERSTAND!!!!
Fanon Porrim: *Flirts with everyone, poses sexily yet classily*
Canon Porrim: Well, there's a lo+t o+f co+ntinuity between befo+ran and earth concepts of gender hierarchy, mo+re than yo+u may think. It's really a fascinating to+pic, if yo+u aren't to+o+ bo+thered by it. Listen, I so+metimes think I give Kanny a little bit to+o+ much freedo+m... do+n't let his to+xic ideas abo+ut gender get to yo+u. Remember to+ keep expo+ring yo+urself in a way that's co+mfo+rtable in yo+ur o+wn skin, and kno+w yo+u can talk to+ me. :)
Fanon Latula: y34h, l3tz g3t d4ng3rous!!!! (#Internally moons about teen love triangle drama)
Canon Latula: y34h, l3tz g3t d4ng3rous!!!! (#Internally suppresses a panic attack possibly related to a legitimate anxiety disorder)
Fanon Aranea: I was never a8le to help myself...To many people knew I was worthless.... 8ut that doesn't mean I can't help you :::::).
Canon Aranea: I was never a8le to help myself... too many people thought I was worthless, probably secretly jealous of my superior a8liities, kindness, and intellect.... 8ut that doesn't mean I can't help you ::::).
Fanon Horuss: 8=D < Uguu desu ne~~~
Canon Horuss: 8=D < It behooves me to act hapfilly all the time! *SCREAMING AND SOBBING INTERNALLY*
Fanon Kurloz: :o)
Canon Kurloz: :o) (# ALL WILL BOW BEFORE THE WICKED-ASS AGE OF BLOOD. INFIDEL PUPPETS, TAKE YOUR PLACE AT MY HAND. I AM BUT THE HUMBLE SERVANT OF THE GREAT ONE. YOUR SOULS WILL KNOW THE FAYGO-SWEET KISS OF TOTAL ANNIHILATION SOON ENOUGH, AND YOUR PAIN WILL BE SMOTHERED BY THE COLD GREASEPAINT OF NOTHINGNESS.)
Fanon Cronus: Another rejection... sigh... guess I'm just as wvorthless as evweryone says.
Canon Cronus: Another rejection. Another ungrateful shitlord. Do they knowv wvhat an HONOR it wvould be? If I felt like it, and they're lucky I don't because they're not wvorth the effort, I could maybe let them knowv wvhat it means to offend royalty... Oh wvait, someone's coming... *SOB* OOOH GUESS I'M JUST AS WVORTHLESS AS EVWERYONE SAYS *HEAVE*.
Fanon Meenah: *Is Nicki Minaj*
Canon Meenah: yeah I killed and attempted to kill several people who probs didnt deserve it but whatevs

meowvgonspengler:

1950S SLANG IS LIKE MY FAVORITE THING IT IS SO RIDICULOUS

LOOK AT

image

image

image

image

WHAT IS THIS

image

DUCK BU TT I AM LAUGHING

image

image

image

RAZZ

MY 

BERRIES

(via reparteeist)

I love Discworld series, you get lines like “He wasn’t an atheist. The gods dealt with atheists severely”.